You are going about your daily routine, whatever it may be, When you receive a message. The message comes with an image of a buff, hairy caveman wearing a tuxedo with a lab coat over it. He has a serious look in his eyes. As his eyes stare through his monocle the message continues.
Captain Doctor Kaveman Recruitment Message~Hello there. It's Captain Doctor Kaveman. If you can read this then congratulations! Out of all the possible instances of you that exist this message managed to make it to the one that can read. I am currently sending this message through multiple time lines and paradoxes so that I can contact the beings that my rival seeks to destroy. Oh yes about that. My Rival, General LaserBot, has stolen my time machine and begun to travel back in time to kill all of you. You are the ones that will stop him in the future. Well technically in some of your future but also some of your past. But fear not the great Captain Kaveman has built or in some of your cases will build... a second time machine! Now I shall come and save you before you are destroyed. Then once we band together we shall defeat General LaserBot. By the time you receive and finish reading this I should be appearing behind you.~ End Of Message
Shortly after reading the message you turn around and are greeted by Captain Doctor Kaveman. After a short encounter you are beamed aboard his flying time machine where you are surrounded by others that seem just as confused as you. Everyone's there waiting for the adventure of several lifetimes.

~ Hello, Captain Doctor Kaveman here. I predicted that you wouldn't read that. I should clarify, I am from the future. Now back in my day people would never disrespect a gentle caveman, like myself. Do you know how long it took me to manifest and send that message? And across multiple instants of time and space? Just think about it for a mere moment. I had to write that very message for Dinosaur Scent, Stone, Paper, E-Mail, Text, Hologram, and Thought Projection. Oh I see, Just because I have a time machine means I can waste as much of it as I want. Well you clearly have no understanding of how time travel works. Ignoring the fact I have an infinite amount of time., Do you understand how difficult that is? It was not a walk across the milky way I guarantee that! At this pace you've put away a note card to read an essay! I dare say that is the most idiotic thing a being can do! That's like trying to start fire using saber cat teeth. I mean I even made it easy for you with emphasis in the message! Well, I will give you a benefit of a doubt, Maybe you're just lazy. If you are lazy, Get up now not the time! Maybe I wasn't clear earlier when I said it so let me say it in layman's terms. YOUR LIFE IS IN DANGER! There. Still a bit confused? Here I'll help you out. If you really want a shortened version, look at the other message and just read the stuff between the Bold Words. Can you do that? Or is that to hard for a neanderthal like you? Now when you are done reading that I would have been standing behind you for about 5 minutes so please hurry along now. I can reassure you I am not going to be in the most pleasant of moods if you don't hurry. Why are you still reading this? Is there still doubt in your mind? Are you still confused? You know what I'm done. Just turn around and go with the guy behind you in the lab coat. Your confused look will explain everything to him and he will simply read you the other message.