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Supaspeed345
Joined: Mon Jan 19, 2009 5:48 pm Posts: 309 Location: I'm somewhere. Someplace. That you know NOTHING of.
Gender: Male
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Character name: Zak Draylith
Gender: Male
Age: 23
Appearence: Dark brown shy eye, deep blue eyes, a green and black jean jacket, black sweats, red sneakers.
Powers: Zak can use dark matter deep inside him to turn into Dark Zak, which gives him 2x the strength he normally has. It was caused by an incident involving a shadow wolf. Shadow Wolves are creatures who live in caverns, decendants of the Shadow King living in the Darklands. They have the power to overshadow people like a ghost, and their pne weakness is light. He ventured too far into a cave and was attacked by a Shadow Wolf. It went inside him, controlling him, until he pulled it out, leaving some dark matter. He can also cause small quakes with his Nature Blade.
Bio: Zak lives in a place called Jijari. It is a small villiage founded by Collin Jijari. Zak has lived a pretty tough life. Though it's had it's benefits. One being that we was accepted into a special sword class. His master, Tai Phoon, who is an official samurai, trined him since the age of 15. At the age of 21, he fought Tai Phoon's best student, winning, and earning a samurai sword. He recieved a certificate, which certified him as a master. But Zak did suffer the loss of his mother at the age of 20. She went into the forest, and was mauled and killed by a bear. After that, his father, Aiden, broke down with sorrow. Zak used soil from her flower garden, some grass, silver, nickel, and iron to create a blade, 6 inches across, 2 feet high. He weilds it in dedication to his mother. It somehow has the power to create a small quake within a 20 feet radius. He discovered that in a sword practice outside. Possibly because it was made from nature.
Weapons: Samurai Sword, Nature's Blade.
Listen, I know I'm missing stuff. I'll keep on updating it until it's perfect. I have also deleted these problems: he no longer can control lightning, I made him 23 so it's more realistic, he no longer has the Dual Magma Axes, I changed how his mother died. Thanks Kyzak for the help on advice. If anyone asks for more, I'll add it in.
_________________ SSF2 Mains - Ichigo, Wario, Megaman, Sora, Ness, Yoshi, Lloyd
Last edited by Supaspeed345 on Thu Aug 27, 2009 6:41 pm, edited 3 times in total.
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Thu Aug 27, 2009 12:00 pm |
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The Cool
Joined: Thu Aug 14, 2008 12:15 pm Posts: 555
Gender: Anime Girl
Currently Playing: Sitting down and playing video games is for chumps.
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Much better (and more believable)
"incident involving a shadow wolf. He ventured too far "
might look better as: "incident involving a shadow wolf in which he ventured too far "
A lot of times, it helps to say things out loud; if it sounds right, it's probably okay.
_________________ ~~~~~Ferail'09~~~~~
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Thu Aug 27, 2009 5:16 pm |
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Supaspeed345
Joined: Mon Jan 19, 2009 5:48 pm Posts: 309 Location: I'm somewhere. Someplace. That you know NOTHING of.
Gender: Male
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_________________ SSF2 Mains - Ichigo, Wario, Megaman, Sora, Ness, Yoshi, Lloyd
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Thu Aug 27, 2009 5:22 pm |
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Doromac
Joined: Wed Dec 31, 2008 2:01 pm Posts: 271 Location: Partyin ALL NIGHT LONG!!!!!
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Give more insight about the world in which he lives in. The bit about the shadow wolf needs something to help show why there is such a thing that lives in his world. I really don't want to say much more until you add more to the bio.
_________________/_██_/ |ಠ_ృ|ಠ_ಠ
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Thu Aug 27, 2009 5:35 pm |
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Supaspeed345
Joined: Mon Jan 19, 2009 5:48 pm Posts: 309 Location: I'm somewhere. Someplace. That you know NOTHING of.
Gender: Male
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You got it! Your requests have been added.
_________________ SSF2 Mains - Ichigo, Wario, Megaman, Sora, Ness, Yoshi, Lloyd
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Thu Aug 27, 2009 6:13 pm |
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Doromac
Joined: Wed Dec 31, 2008 2:01 pm Posts: 271 Location: Partyin ALL NIGHT LONG!!!!!
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So they live in caves, but what makes them "shadow wolves" and what makes them so special.
_________________/_██_/ |ಠ_ృ|ಠ_ಠ
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Thu Aug 27, 2009 6:35 pm |
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Supaspeed345
Joined: Mon Jan 19, 2009 5:48 pm Posts: 309 Location: I'm somewhere. Someplace. That you know NOTHING of.
Gender: Male
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Ooooooh...well, I never thought of that. I'll add it when I can. Edit: It's been added. Please, do not ask about the Shadow King. He will be explained later. If you really want the story, I'll tell you.
_________________ SSF2 Mains - Ichigo, Wario, Megaman, Sora, Ness, Yoshi, Lloyd
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Thu Aug 27, 2009 6:39 pm |
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Doromac
Joined: Wed Dec 31, 2008 2:01 pm Posts: 271 Location: Partyin ALL NIGHT LONG!!!!!
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I want to give you time to form a good story for the shadow king explanation, so I won't stress you over that now.
_________________/_██_/ |ಠ_ృ|ಠ_ಠ
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Thu Aug 27, 2009 6:58 pm |
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Supaspeed345
Joined: Mon Jan 19, 2009 5:48 pm Posts: 309 Location: I'm somewhere. Someplace. That you know NOTHING of.
Gender: Male
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I have a story ready. But it's horrible, so I'm revising it. I'll post it later. Here it is: THE SHADOW KING: Zak had a friend named Blake Shenri. Shadows have taken over his village. Zak and Blake teamed up. They defeated the shadows throughout the town, and ventured into Demon's Ditch, an abandoned haunted mine. They looked and found the Shadow Key. After venturing to the end, they defeated 2 shadow knights, used the Shadow Key, and entered Shadow Land. They crossed the bridge, and made it to a big open area, where they fought many shadows. They were able to make it into the Shadow Lair, where they fought 5 Shadow Knights. Then, the Shadow King appeared. He was a shadow, pitch black, 50 feet tall, wore a red cape and a crown. They used brute strength snd strategy to defeat him. All shadows disappeared, except for all the Shadow Wolves. They found caves and lived in then.
_________________ SSF2 Mains - Ichigo, Wario, Megaman, Sora, Ness, Yoshi, Lloyd
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Thu Aug 27, 2009 7:00 pm |
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{420}sMoKeWeEd{420}
Joined: Fri Aug 15, 2008 10:03 pm Posts: 2825 Location: being a genius Gender: little girl Country:
Gender: Anime Girl
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shadow shadow shadow shadow shadow shadow shadow shadow shadow shadow
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Fri Aug 28, 2009 9:57 am |
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Supaspeed345
Joined: Mon Jan 19, 2009 5:48 pm Posts: 309 Location: I'm somewhere. Someplace. That you know NOTHING of.
Gender: Male
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_________________ SSF2 Mains - Ichigo, Wario, Megaman, Sora, Ness, Yoshi, Lloyd
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Fri Aug 28, 2009 12:09 pm |
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Kyzak
Joined: Mon Aug 11, 2008 2:05 pm Posts: 1527 Location: (ノ◕ヮ◕)ノ*♥:・゚✧
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If there were ratings, I would give you a box.
On all 102 of your posts.
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Fri Aug 28, 2009 12:35 pm |
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Supaspeed345
Joined: Mon Jan 19, 2009 5:48 pm Posts: 309 Location: I'm somewhere. Someplace. That you know NOTHING of.
Gender: Male
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_________________ SSF2 Mains - Ichigo, Wario, Megaman, Sora, Ness, Yoshi, Lloyd
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Fri Aug 28, 2009 2:10 pm |
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Doromac
Joined: Wed Dec 31, 2008 2:01 pm Posts: 271 Location: Partyin ALL NIGHT LONG!!!!!
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| | | | Supaspeed345 wrote: I have a story ready. But it's horrible, so I'm revising it. I'll post it later. Here it is: THE SHADOW KING: Zak had a friend named Blake Shenri. Shadows have taken over his village. Zak and Blake teamed up. They defeated the shadows throughout the town, and ventured into Demon's Ditch, an abandoned haunted mine. They looked and found the Shadow Key. After venturing to the end, they defeated 2 shadow knights, used the Shadow Key, and entered Shadow Land. They crossed the bridge, and made it to a big open area, where they fought many shadows. They were able to make it into the Shadow Lair, where they fought 5 Shadow Knights. Then, the Shadow King appeared. He was a shadow, pitch black, 50 feet tall, wore a red cape and a crown. They used brute strength snd strategy to defeat him. All shadows disappeared, except for all the Shadow Wolves. They found caves and lived in then. | | | | |
Don't like it. Through out the shadow king s*** and all the shadow talk. Shadow wolf is ok, but just a different explanation for it k.
_________________/_██_/ |ಠ_ృ|ಠ_ಠ
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Fri Aug 28, 2009 3:05 pm |
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THoT
Joined: Mon Aug 11, 2008 6:41 am Posts: 9311 Location: Australia Country:
Gender: Female
Skype: THoT_MDR
Waifu: You!
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How many eyes does he have?
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Fri Aug 28, 2009 9:58 pm |
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