What did the pencil sharperner say to the running pencil?

Hurry up and get to the point

Again, easily offended people do not read.

A man walks into a plastic surgeon's office and tells him he wants to be black. The doctor says, "Okay but I'll have to make you 30% dumber, make your skin 70% darker, and your p**** 2 inches longer." After the operation the doctor says, "I'm sorry but there were a few mistakes. Instead we made you 70% dumber, your skin 30% darker, and your p**** 2 inches shorter. Are you okay with this?" To which the man replies, "Si Señor."

This is kind of a racist joke, so I suggest that, if your easily offended plz dont read.
What's the difference between a Jew and a Pizza? The Pizza dont scream.

You sort of messed up the joke. It goes, Whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew? A pizza doesn't scream when put into the oven.

But on the subject of Holocaust jokes...

Why did Hitler kill himself? He got his gas bill.

How do you fit 51 Jews in a car? One in the driver's seat and 50 in the ashtray.

I translated it from Spanish to English. That's why it make that much sense.

What did a math book say to another math book? Ive got more problems than you.

A man calls his friend's house and his wife answers. The man asks if Tim is there but the wife replies that he went out. The man asks if he can wait for him there and the wife says okay. Later the man and Tim's wife are sitting on a couch. The man says, "You know you have such great breasts. I would pay 100 bucks to see just one." Tim's wife thinks for a while and shows one boob to the man. Later the man says, "I can't take just seeing one! I'll pay another hundred to see them both." Tim's wife thinks for a moment then lifts up her shirt exposing both her breasts. Later the man says he can't wait longer and has to leave. After the man leaves Tim comes home. His wife says, "Your weird friend was here looking for you." Than Tim said, "Did he drop off the 200 bucks he owes me?"

For the love of everything that is good and holy, stop posting.

HAAHAHAHA.


HHHAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHHAA.
AAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA.



Those are f***' great. I lol'd so hard.

Racist jokes ahoy!

A black man and a Mexican man are in car. Who's diving? Neither. The policeman is.

When 100 white people run down a hill its a avalanche. When 100 black people run down a hill its a mudslide. When 100 Mexican people run down a hill its a jailbreak.

Whats the difference between a black man and a couch? A couch can support a family of four.

Why is there little pieces of cotton at the top of aspirin bottles? To remind black people that they were cotton pickers before they were drug dealers.

What happens to a Jew if he runs into a wall with an erection? He gets a broken nose.

What do the KKK and Nike have in common? They have been making black people run for years.

Oh. My. God. Dude. You're makin' my sides hurt.

One day little Suzie came home from school went up to her mama and said, "Jimmy showed me his wiener today!" Her mother, shocked, was about to say something until little Suzie said, "It reminded me of a peanut!" Her mother quickly calmed down and said, "So it was small, eh?" little Suzie then responded, "No. Salty!"

What's worse than a bucket of dead babies?
The one still alive at the bottom.

What's worse than that?
He has to eat himself out.

And worse than that?
He went back for seconds.

A black man, a Jewish man, and a Mexican man walk into a bar and the Barkeep says, "Get the f*** out."

Racist, much? Lol.

Anyway... if anyone knows the FML jokes, you know they're funny.

Today, for the first time in 15 years, my dad is having a go at parenting. Not as being my parent though, but for some random overseas kid he applied guardianship for. FML

racist jokes are posted in this thread because the creator in question enjoys them, get over it

how is that a joke it's not a joke you have no future in comedy get out.